The Luv song......

Dis is like a short journey into my take on luv...wat its done and taught me.....

saw d girl of my dreams in college
was dis luv or just another crush
got to know her
got to luv her and den like her
liked her positives
loved her negatives
dont know what it is that keeps me going back
one fine day i said it and den she said it
life was over in that moment
didnt even flash b4 my eyes
held everything i felt deep within me
lest sumthing was seen...
as a reason to keep away
lest sumthing was perceived
as a wound left open...hurting
didnt even try to forget her
because my heart beats and its hard to ignore
didnt even try to hate her
because dying would have been a easier way out
got into a lot of things i wouldnt have
tring to catch her eye
trying to forget her eyes
those dreams i saw
with all d rest of them
she was always there in them
she was always d reason behind them
dont really know why am penning this down
maybe its my frustration
maybe its my helplessness
whats she feeling for me at dis moment
hate, revulsion or a sort of distant remembrance?
am still in college am still around her
its too little...whatever's left between us
just shattered glasses from a broken friendship
i was to blame and i was to explain
i was always poor at this
was always too scared
too lost to make sense
in the end its all gone wrong
like everything between us
like all the rest behind us
my story ends like dis
luv made sense finally
that luv doesnt make sense
she had to leave
she had enough
she had to go
she had her life to live
i walk on and live my life
i sing along my lonely song
i walk alone; me and my broken song
and i will fade out like my song
nothing here i have to carry along
nobody there but me alone
and i know i will die b4 long
because i can live without my heart...
but for how long........

Ek kavi ki kahaani

Meri khwahishen kuch baaki hain,
Jeevan ek alpaviraam hai,
Kavi ka naam badnaam hai,
Jeevan mein mere liye bacha hi kya hai.

Log kisi aur par fida hain,
Haseenaye doosron ke baahon mein jaane ke liye bekraar hain,
Mera chota bhai mujhse behtar hai,
Jeevan mein mere liye bacha hi kya hai.

Meri maa mujhse naraaz hai,
Mere dost aapas mein kehte hain;
“arre chod yaar, who toh bekar hai.”
Jeevan mein mere liye bacha hi kya hai.

Lekin, sochne lagta hoon main, upar ek bhagwan hai,
Mere maathe par bhi uska haath hai,
Har ek ki andar ek bhagwan hai,
Jiska naam aatma-vishwas hai.

Mere haath kalam ki orr jaate hain,
Kaagaz ko chooker who likh jaate hain,
Log rukkar, padhkar, bole jaate hain…
“wah bhai wah, ye kya likhta hai…!”

Don’t stop to shed a few tears for me,
Don’t want your tears,[feelings] don’t want your smile,
The reason for the pain, the thought behind it all,
Just leave me with my pain,
You have got nothing left to gain.
Break my heart, break my will again,
Leave me lost again.
Same words, same refrain,
Again and again leaves me lost forever…

Sumthin i wrote for a friend during raksha bandhan...

A warm fuzzy feeling,
Like a teddy cuddled,
Its starting to dawn on me
What fun being a brother can be
Hope this service never ends
Hope this makes us more than friends
If we cant be the couple I dreamed we would be,
If being just a friend is just too distant[insensitive],
Then I am sure, pretty much from the bottom of my heart,
That I will still love you,
Still take care of you,
Still fulfill your every desire,
Still look at your face and feel a tremble,
Do everything I can do for you,
But mind you;
As your mothers unborn son,
As your unborn twin brother…….

waking up....

Luv and crushes seem so distant a problem,
Life teaches its lessons slowly,
Maybe it was meant to be this way,
I don’t want to do all the things I thought I wanted to do,
Life comes once; success opens its doors only once…..

Unwinding....

How do you tell her that you love her
how do you make her understand
that its not a game you seem to be playing
how do u distinguish yourself
from the grime that she is used to seeing
its not that simple to be simple
unike the ease with which you can be
different,alternate,wound-up and more....

Still Living...

Am living like am dead
doesnt make much sense
ppl think there's sumthin wrong with my head
let them laugh...atleast at my expense......
All this talk about life
seems for the birds,seems so
distant a dream;a distant hope
life as of now looks so lonely
sad,wrecked,truly wretched
i was a happier man when i had my thoughts
now i have only myself and i am all alone.
this life is starting to drown me
my life force starting to swell within me
all men have dreams, some men live dreams
i see dreams and wonder
what possibly can tear it asunder
a small little voice;the one
that sounds like your soul answers
one word.it tells me,no,whispers
as the wind whispers its secrets
to the dark night,the only one in the world
the only mortal capable of stopping you is


you.

mirror to the world

I once loved
My life and everything
Around me
I once cared
For her and everything
Around her
I once looked
Upto them and everything
Around them
Then life went and
showed me the way its meant
To be and Not to be
A reflection; To be a real
person and not an academic mirror.

happiness revisited

This time its real
The happiness is meant to last
Maybe this is bliss
The anticipation before the first kiss

Free to fall down
The bottomless pit of love
Tranquility has many forms
And i hav found peace

The world seems a
Better evil today
I am human again
The world is my home again.

Dont noe wat it is dat prompted me 2 sit up in d middle of d nite 2 start my blog-journey...
mebe its d unabated sound of ma frnd akki(comrade-in arms in d war against conservatism) dat finally did d trick...
so watever follows in d days 2 come...u noe wer d blame goes....
Am kinda wonky rite now but am nuts d rest of d time....so i guess dat kinda sums it all up on wat u can expect frm me....